Harvard psychologist: 5 signs you’re overparenting your kids—and how to really raise resilient children
Psychologist and parenting expert Dr. Meredith Elkins shares her best advice for how to raise more confident and resilient kids — and not "overparent" them
TL;DR
- Overparenting involves overinvolvement and overprotection, undermining a child's confidence and resilience.
- Five signs of overparenting include solving a child's problems, shielding them from negative emotions, expecting fragility, emphasizing results over the learning process, and letting parental anxiety dictate actions.
- Parents should pause before offering solutions, normalize negative feelings while expressing confidence in the child's ability to cope, set age-appropriate expectations, allow mistakes to happen and learn from them, and reflect on whether actions stem from the child's needs or parental anxiety.
- The key is to find a balance: guide without controlling, support without rescuing, and coach while trusting.
- Resilience develops when children feel secure enough to try and free enough to learn independently.