‘I’m going to scream!’: how to survive (and maybe even enjoy) your family Christmas
From preparing safe topics to taking silly games, we ask the experts how to avoid falling out with your nearest and dearest – before, during and after the big day
TL;DR
- Schedule breaks and arrange outings to get away from difficult family members.
- Practice grounding techniques like the 5-4-3-2-1 method to stay present and reduce anxiety.
- Prepare safe conversation topics and phrases for uncomfortable subjects.
- Bring innocuous distractions like games or trivia.
- Identify a support network (friends, family allies) and establish a code word for needing help.
- Plan self-care activities to boost mood and well-being before interactions.
- Manage expectations by remembering that close, warm relationships are not the norm for most people.
- Visualize positive outcomes for challenging situations.
- Reflect on your feelings and their origins to understand your responses.
- Engage difficult relatives by focusing on their interests and asking open-ended questions.
- Use breathing exercises like box breathing or five-finger breathing to calm down.
- Rate your emotional state on a scale and identify actions to lower it.
- Employ exit strategies, such as faking a phone call or excusing yourself to the bathroom.
- Practice self-compassion and acknowledge common feelings of anger or hurt.
- Write down experiences and feelings after the visit to process anxiety.
- Consider therapy to address persistent patterns or difficult feelings related to family interactions.
- Reflect on your role in interactions and apologize if necessary, or accept what you cannot control.
- Recharge by engaging in enjoyable activities and connecting with supportive people.