I'm a psychologist who studies couples: People in the happiest relationships do 7 things on weeknights—that most neglect
Want to know the difference between happy and unhappy couples? Observe how they spend their evenings after work. Mark Travers, a psychologist who studies couples, shares what people in successful relationships do together in their weeknight free time.
TL;DR
- Working couples can strengthen their connection by prioritizing nightly routines over exhaustion.
- Decompression time (15-30 minutes of guilt-free alone time) helps partners recharge.
- Silent sync involves quiet shared activities like sitting together or taking a slow walk to emotionally regulate.
- A quick daily recap, sharing one good or bad thing about the day without advice, keeps partners updated.
- Maintaining one honored daily ritual, like eating dinner together without phones, provides an anchor.
- Cuddling before sleep releases oxytocin and lowers cortisol, boosting relationship satisfaction.
- Closing the kitchen as a team (5-10 minutes of shared tidying) promotes fairness.
- Checking in about tomorrow's plans or potential challenges helps partners anticipate needs.