health
I feel a lot of affection for a friend at work – could I be in love?
Would you want this to become sexual? If the answer is yes, then think about what might be holding you back
TL;DR
- The author experiences deep affection and imagines a future with a male friend from work, questioning if it's love.
- Her feelings have developed over months, and while she doesn't find him perfect, she desires more time together.
- Psychoanalyst Susanna Abse differentiates between 'explosive' love and 'pragmatic' get-togethers, asking about fantasies of sex.
- Abse suggests that if the desire is for a sexual relationship, the hesitancy to explore it involves understanding personal jeopardy and the potential impact on the friendship.
- The author is encouraged to consider how her actions would change if she accepted she was in love, as a way to understand her true feelings.