health
What a Century-Old Sex Manual Got Right
In 1926, a widely respected Dutch gynecologist named Theodoor Hendrik van de Velde published a manual whose aim was to explain the vital role of sex in marriage. “What husband and wife who love one another seek to achieve in their most intimate bodily communion,” he wrote, is “a means of expression that makes them One.” The book, Ideal Marriage: Its Physiology and Technique, was addressed mostly to men—and became a best seller. It ran for more than 300 pages and included detailed sections on hygiene, sexual positions, and human reproduction. But the text’s most remarkable trait—to me, a reader encountering it 100 years later—is that its author did not so much advise as exhort men to concentrate on their wife’s pleasure. A man, van de Velde wrote, “must know how to make love.” (Italics his.)
TL;DR
- Theodoor Hendrik van de Velde's 1926 book *Ideal Marriage* became a bestseller by advocating for men to prioritize their wives' sexual pleasure.
- The book contained progressive ideas about women's potential for sexual response and satisfaction, alongside problematic eugenicist and racist views characteristic of its era.
- Despite its emphasis on female pleasure, the book maintained a patriarchal perspective, instructing women on behavior and feelings, and was criticized as "phallocentric."
- Published before the sexual revolution, *Ideal Marriage* sold hundreds of thousands of copies in the US, aided by its medical framing and relaxed obscenity law enforcement.
- The manual's focus on marital stability and population concerns, coupled with its male-centric perspective, offers a cautionary tale about discussing women's sexuality.